Attila the Nun
- Грэхэм Чепмен
- Miss Norris
- Кэрол Кливленд
- Первый голос за кадром
- Джон Клиз
- Второй голос за кадром
- Майкл Пейлин
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- First Voice Over
- John Cleese
- Second Voice Over
- Michael Palin
- Graham Chapman
- Miss Norris
- Carol Cleveland
Sketch:(Cut to a country road. After three seconds a motorbike appears in the distance and speeds towards the camera. We see that a wild-looking nun is riding it.)
1st Voice Over: Yes, it's Attila the Nun.
(Attila the Nun flashes past the camera, There is a loud sound of the bike crashing off camera.)
2nd Voice Over: A simple country girl who took a vow of eternal brutality.
(Attila the Nun on a hospital bed, struggling wildly with two doctors and a nurse who are trying to hold her down. She looks really fearsome. Another doctor enters and summons the nurse away.)
(The camera tracks away and comes up on another bed in which is sitting a beautiful girl revealing more than a patient normally would and endowed with Carol's . . . undoubted attributes. Screens are placed around her. The doctor and nurse come in through the screens.)
Doctor: Hello, Miss Norris. How are you?
Miss Norris: Not too bad, thank you, doctor.
Doctor: Yes, well I think I'd better examine you.
(Cut to a line of half a dozen shabby men in filthy macintosh coats down to the floor and caps, who shuffle in through the screens and stand at the foot of the bed leering.)
Miss Norris: What are they doing here?
Doctor: It's all right, they're students. Um… light please, nurse. (a single red spotlight fills down on the girl; cut back to the men leering) Oh… and… er… music, too. (nurse presses a switch beside bed; stripper music; very loud; cut. to line of men getting very exalted - hands deep in pockets) Breathe in ,.. out … in … out…
(After about five seconds the music reaches a climax and ends. The men in macs all applaud.)