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Sketch:
Interviewer: Mr L. F. Dibley's 'Finian's Rainbow'. And now
over to me.
(close-up of interviewer) Exclusively on the programme
today we have the Foreign Secretary, who has just returned from the
bitter fighting in the Gulf of Amman. He's going to tell us about canoeing.
(On the bank of a river seen from the other side. There is a canoe
on the bank a man in a pinstripe suit stands beside it. Superimposed
caption: 'THE FOREIGN SECRETARY' He gives a little rough and gets in.
Two Arabs run in from other side of frame, lift up the canoe and throw
it and the Foreign Secretary into the water. Cut back to the interviewer.)
Interviewer: That gives you just some idea of what's going on
out there. Today saw the long-awaited publication of the Portman Committee's
Report on Industrial Reorganization…
(CAPTION: 'SOMETHING SILLY'S
GOING TO HAPPEN') Interviewer: It's taken five years to prepare
and it's bound to have an enormous impact on the future of industrial
relations in this country. In the studio tonight Lord Porlrnan, Chairman
of the Committee, Sir Charles Avery, Employers' Reorganization Council,
and Ray Millichope, leader of the Allied Technicians' Union. And they're
going to make a human pyramid.
(Three men in shorts run on to accompaniment
of tinkling music and form a pyramid As they complete it we cut to film
of Vatican crowds and dub on enormous ovation.) Interviewer:
.Bra… vo. Now the President of the Board of Trade…
(Cut back
to the same river bank shot from across the river. The President of
the Board of Trade in pinstripes is standing beside a hamper. He smiles
and gets in, and lowers the liaL Once again two Arabs run in from either
side and throw it in. All these sequences are speeded up.) Interviewer:
Now here's the Vice-Chairman of ICI.
(Cut back to same river bank.
A head looking out of the hamper. It disappears as two Arabs run in
and toss it in.) Interviewer: Well, so much for politics
and the problems of Britain's industrial reorganization. Now we turn
to the hghter subject of sport, and Reg Harris, the former world cycling
sprint champion, talks to us about the psychological problems of big
race preparation.
(Reg and his bike are thrown in the river by the
Arabs) And now the world of song - Anne Zeigler and Webster Booth.
(two hampers thrown in river by four Arabs) Well, all good things
must come to an end, and that's all for this week. But to close our
programme, Dame Irene Stoat, who celebrates her eighty-fifth birthday
this month, reads one of her most famous poems.
(Cut to the river
bank. An old lady is standing beside it, but this time on the bank of
the river nearest the camera. On the other bank we see the Arabs run
into shot, realize they've been foiled and leap up and down in anger.)
Dame Irene: Who shall declare this good, that ill When good and
ill so intertwine But to fulfil the vast design Of an omniscient will.
When seeming again but turns to loss When earthly treasure proves but
dross And what seems lost but turns again To high eternal gain.
(The
Arabs run out of vision. Suddenly, from right beside the camera, with
a bloodcurdling seream a Samurai warrior with drawn sword leaps upon
her and hurls her backwards into the water. The warrior then strikes
up a fierce heroic pose for the camera. Superimposed caption on screen:
'NEWHAVEN - LE HAVRE. GETAWAY TO THE CONTINENT'
