The man who speaks only the ends of words, the biginnings of words & the middles of words

Скетч:

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Sketch:

(Enter from back of set as per Eamonn Andrews show Mr Ohn lth. He sits at the desk)

Mr Ith: … ood … ing.

Interviewer: Nice to have you on the show.

Mr Ith: … ice … o … e … ere.

Interviewer: Mr Ith, don't you find it very difficult to make yourself understood?

Mr Ith: Yes, it is extremely difficult.

Interviewer: Just a minute, you're a fraudl

Mr Ith: Oh no. I can speak the third and fourth sentences perfectly normally.

Interviewer: Oh I see. So your next sentence will be only the ends of words again?

Mr Ith: T's… ight.

Interviewer: Well, let's move on to our next guest who speaks only the beginnings of words, Mr J … Sm… Mr Sm… good evening.

(Enter Mr Sm.)

Mr Sm: G… e…

Interviewer: Well, have you two met before?

Mr Sm: N…

Mr Ith: … o

Mr Sm: N…

Mr Ith: … o

Interviewer: Well, this is really a fascinating occasion because we have in the studio Mr … oh … I … who speaks only the middles of words. Good evening.

(Enter Scot.)

Scot: …. oo …… ni…

Interviewer: Um, where do you come from?

Scot: . .. u… i… a…

Interviewer: Dunfermline in Scotland. Well let me introduce you, Mr Ohn Ith…

Mr Ith: … ood … ing.

Scot: … oo …… ni…

Interviewer: J… Sm…

Scot: … oo …… ni…

Mr Sm: G… Eve…

Interviewer: Yes, well, ha, ha, just a moment. Perhaps you would all like to say good evening together.

Mr Sm: G…

Scot: . .. oo…

Mr Ith: … d

Mr Sm: Eve…

Scot: … ni…

Mr Ith: … ing.