Piston engine (a bargin)
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Sketch:Mrs Non-Robinson (?)
During this exchange there have been six cuts to close-ups of radios of different shapes and sizes. Mrs Non-Robinson
Pull out to reveal a pepperpot. Mrs Non-Gorilla sitting beside a radio on a park bench. Mrs Robinson
Quick cut to a hospital, doctor on a bed listening to a radio. It switches off. Doctor (Graham)
Cut back to Mrs Non-Gorilla. Another pepperpot approaches. Mrs Non-Gorilla
She reveals a six-cylinder car engine on a white tray, on a trolley. Mrs Non-Gorilla
Start to pan away from them, their voices become fainter Mrs Non-Gorilla
Pan across a civic park, of which the only occupants are about ten pepperpots, dressed identically, scattered across on benches. One pepperpot is in a wheelchair. We come in to Mrs Non-Smoker, unwrapping a parcel and calling to the birds. Mrs Non-Smoker (Terry J.)
Shw unwraps the parcel revealing a leg of lamb which she hurls at the gathered birds. A screech. She kills a pigeon. She reaches in a another bag and produces two tins of pineapple chunks and throws them. Mrs Non-Smoker
She chortles with delight as she hurls a huge jar of mayonnaise which smashes messily. She then throws a large frozen turkey, a jar of onions, a bag of frozen peas, and a bottle of wine. We widen as Mrs Smoker, with an identical piston engine to the last pepperpot, comes up to Mrs Non-Smoker. Quite a large area in front of Mrs Non-Smoker is littered with packaged foods and dead birds; a bird is pecking at a tin of paté; a small pond in front of her has a swan upside down with its feet sticking in the air, a huge tin floating beside it. Mrs Non-Smoker
They get up and go. Fade to black.